Tuesday, October 22, 2002

 

With apologies to the actual families of the actual ten individuals who were killed by Sniperman, in my mind the worst thing he has done to America is to expose to us in harsh detail our national weaknesses.

"In days of old when men were bold" (a time recent enough that I vaguely remember it), such a "crisis" would have produced the following response: Men in the affected communities and the surrounding countryside would have, without invitation or draft, grabbed THEIR hunting rifles and gathered in the very parking lots so recently bathed in blood, and would have formed up shifts--and would have provided 24-hour shoulder-to-shoulder armed patrol of EVERY wooded area in a 100-mile radius, and all Chief Moose would have had to do was to award the bounty to the group of guys who drug in the carcass of Sniperman--after which they would have taken the bounty check to the local bar and every participant in the posse would have toasted to their success--then gone home and wiped their muddy boots on their now-safe front porches.

Nowadays the accepted response is for the entire country, led and commented upon by the media, to curl into a collective fetal position and whimper. And, preposterously, such sniveling is regarded as a sign of strength. If you don't snivel, it is because you are afraid to express your feelings, and therefore need professional help. Dr. Phil and an army of tax-funded therapists will be on after the break to teach you how to snivel better.

Our response to Sniperman is a microcosm of our response to "Global Terrorism": we crawl on our knees and beg the U.N. for permission to defend ourselves... Meanwhile, we should be taking our cues from the Israeli Army--who, in response to a "palestinian" son-of-a-bitch blowing himself to bits along with innocent Israeli victims, is to predictably, (and without first asking permission) bulldoze down the cesspool raghead neighborhood that spawned and raised the now-vaporized raghead into the venomous mother-killer that he grew to be.

Predictable--Punctual--Precise

But we, taking our advice from the French (who have already sent an envoy to Sniperman's home to surrender to him) are zigzagging across the K-Mart parking lot to buy more Kleenex...

posted by huggy 8:01 PM